Keeping Kosher and COVID19

It would be scandalous to write a blog about medical Halacha during the coronavirus pandemic and not have anything to say about COVID19.  I have been trying to think of something to write that would add  something useful to the conversation, an angle that hasn't already been covered. 

Early on in this pandemic, an interesting discussion came to my attention regarding the origins of the coronavirus. It is assumed that this virus evolved in a species of bat that is indigenous to China. Partly because of the human consumption of bats in China, it was able to make an interspecies jump and infect humans. The "atalef" (Hebrew for "bat") is listed as one of the non kosher birds that is prohibited by the Torah for human consumption. If the kosher laws were kept, would we have had to suffer this terrible deadly pandemic? This discussion in the media (see here for example) renewed my interest in a topic of much deeper importance, which I hope to address in this new series in my blog.

As observant Jews, we must "keep kosher".  The laws of kosher include thousands of laws and customs with many varied origins.  Why do we need to observe these dietary rules? As we have seen in this blog before there are two very different schools of thought in Judaism which can both complement and clash with each other. These are the mystical and the rationalist schools.

The mystical stream tends to explain these religious rules by ascribing spiritual and unseen forces that make one action kosher and the other action not kosher.  This stream of thought is more likely to explain the reasons for the kosher laws by saying that we do it because God said so. The rationalist school is more likely to search for practical and physically meaningful lessons in the rules of kosher.  Surely God told us to keep these laws, but He wanted us to do it for a reason that we can and should understand.

I believe strongly that the recent sea change in Orthodoxy which has deeply emphasized the mystical way of thinking has done terrible damage to the purpose of keeping kosher.  I think we have lost our way because we have forgotten the point of keeping kosher.  While clearly the mystical ideas are important and have their place in our religion, the bottom line has been all but forgotten.

Rather than engage in polemics and arguments, I think we need need to get back to basics. In my usual style, I will begin by discussing the biblical origins of the laws of kosher.  Then we will analyze the Talmudic and rabbinic discussions and how they developed into what we call kosher today.  This will take a long series of posts. Then we can look back and see how different the world would be if only we remembered the rationalistic basis of what God really wants from us.

I was taught by the many great rabbis from whom I have learned over the years, that we never should be content learning a topic the same way we have studied it over the years.  We must always review a verse or a talmudic statement as if we are studying it for the first time. So even if you think you already know everything you need to know about kosher, I hope you can find something useful in going through this process together.  Only this way can we grow and change. I know that I once thought I knew everything too.

Kosher Species

Let's start with Leviticus chapter 11 which discusses the species of animals that are permitted to eat, and those that are prohibited.  For the majority of the discussion, the Torah lays out the rules, split hooves and chewing their cud for animals, fins and scales for fish, forbidden insects, forbidden birds.  Although the Torah repeats several times that these non kosher animals should be considered disgusting to you ("sheketz") the Torah is not clear about the reasoning behind it.  However, in verses 44 and 45, the Torah states emphatically why we should only consume the kosher animals:

(44) For I the LORD am your God: you shall sanctify yourselves and be holy, for I am holy. You shall not make yourselves unclean through any swarming thing that moves upon the earth.  (45) For I the LORD am He who brought you up from the land of Egypt to be your God: you shall be holy, for I am holy. 

So the reason why are commanded to eat only kosher species is to "sanctify ourselves and be holy". Although this may sound like it is only referring to insects, the following verses make it clear that this holiness is achieved by avoiding all non kosher categories of animals, as the verses continue:

(46) These are the instructions concerning animals, birds, all living creatures that move in water, and all creatures that swarm on earth, (47) for distinguishing between the unclean and the clean, between the living things that may be eaten and the living things that may not be eaten.  

So God does tell us very clearly the reason why we must keep kosher. We need to be "holy".  In Deuteronomy 14, the Torah again mentions the kosher species, and again it is in the context of "holiness", though this time said a little differently.

"(2) for you are a holy people to the LORD your God: the LORD your God chose you from among all other peoples on earth to be His treasured people. (3) You shall not eat anything abhorrent. (4)These are the animals that you may eat..."

Again, the Torah lists the species of animals that one may or may not eat. Again, the Torah makes it very clear that the reason for the kosher rules is because of "holiness".  So the Torah does clearly tell us the reason for the prohibitions against eating certain species. Holiness.  But we will have to define what this is. I am going to save that for a future post.  

 Proper Slaughter  

The next important kosher rule is related not to the species of animal in question, but to the method of slaughter.  Kosher slaughter is called "shechita" and is a method of slaughter described by the rabbis of the Talmud as a method which was taught by God to Moses and passed down through oral tradition.  The origin of this tradition is recorded in the Torah itself:

"If the place where the LORD has chosen to establish His name is too far from you, you may slaughter any of the cattle or sheep that the LORD gives you, as I have instructed you; and you may eat to your heart’s content in your settlements (Deutoronomy 12:21)"

So God tells us that He has instructed us how to slaughter an animal, and our tradition tells us what God's instructions were. We must use a sharp and smooth knife, and in one quick motion, we must sever the carotid arteries and trachea, quick and straightforward, with minimal pain and suffering.  However here the Torah does not explain the reasoning behind this commandment.  One does get the sense from the verse though, that God does not want us to randomly kill and slaughter animals for our own benefit.  If we need to do it, it is permitted, but it has to be done in a proper way.  As God has taught us.

 Blood

The next important rule of kosher eating is the prohibition against eating blood.  In this case the Torah does clearly explain the reasoning behind the prohibition:

(23) But make sure that you do not partake of the blood; for the blood is the life, and you must not consume the life with the flesh. (24) You must not partake of it; you must pour it out on the ground like water: (25) you must not partake of it, in order that it may go well with you and with your descendants to come, for you will be doing what is right in the sight of the LORD.

Once you have chosen the proper kosher species of animal, and it is slaughtered properly, God still has more to ask of you.  You must remove the blood, because the blood is the "life" of the animal.  The Torah again states clearly the reasoning behind the prohibition against consuming blood.  The blood represents that this was once a living being, and by removing it we remember that we are consuming something that was once alive.  The specifics of how the blood is removed we learn from our tradition.

"Torn" Animals (Tereifah)

We are far from finished. We learned that animals must be properly slaughtered, but what about animals that have died through other natural means, not at the hands of human beings? The Torah teaches us about this as well:

"You shall be holy people to Me: you must not eat flesh torn by beasts in the field; you shall cast it to the dogs.(Exodus 23:30)"

Our tradition teaches us that animals "torn by beasts" includes all sick and injured animals that either have died of their injuries, or will inevitably die of their injuries or illnesses in the near future.  This is the origin of the rule that animals are not kosher to eat unless they are healthy and died only as a result of kosher slaughter.  An animal that died from some other cause, or would soon have died of some other cause is not considered fit for human consumption. This is why animals must be checked for injuries or diseases that could have potentially caused their demise in order for them to be rendered "kosher". Most importantly for our discussion, the Torah was again very clear about the reason for this prohibition. We are a "holy" people, and this practice is consistent with "holiness".

An Animal that Died Naturally (Nevelah)

Since we must properly slaughter an animal in order to eat it, we are prohibited from eating an animal that has died on its own, without proper slaughter.  However, if we own such an animal, the Torah directs us regarding what to do with it:

(21) You shall not eat anything that has died a natural death; give it to the stranger in your community to eat, or you may sell it to a foreigner for you are a holy people to the LORD your God.

Again, the Torah emphasizes the concept of holiness. This could mean one of two things from the context of the verse.  It could mean that we are prohibited from eating the animal because of holiness, or it could mean that we should give it to our neighbors due to holiness. The concept of holiness with regard to an animal that died without proper slaughter is repeated in the Torah in Exodus 22:30:

You shall be holy people to Me: you must not eat flesh torn by beasts in the field; you shall cast it to the dogs. 

Here again the concept of holiness is mentioned, and it could again mean two things.  You should be holy by not consuming meat that wasn't properly slaughtered, but you should also be holy by putting the meat to good use by giving it to animals to eat. I believe that the Torah is emphasizing both.  That although we must be holy by properly slaughtering animals that we eat, we should also be holy by making sure to properly use the meat of animals that we cannot consume by giving it to others.  These both constitute "holiness".  Like I said before, we will get back to this concept in detail later in the series.  

Gid HaNasheh (Displaced Nerve)

Even after we make sure that an animal is the right species, and it is healthy, and it is slaughtered in the appropriate way, and the blood is removed, there are still parts of the animal that are prohibited to eat.  These parts must be removed prior to consumption of the animal. Two primary categories of animal parts that may not be consumed are the "Gid Hanasheh" and the "Chelev". The Gid Hanasheh is the "displaced nerve" and its' origins are from this verse in Genesis 32:

(25) Jacob was left alone. And a man wrestled with him until the break of dawn. (26) When he saw that he had not prevailed against him, he wrenched Jacob’s hip at its socket, so that the socket of his hip was strained as he wrestled with him. ... (32) The sun rose upon him as he passed Penuel, limping on his hip. (33) That is why the children of Israel to this day do not eat the thigh muscle that is on the socket of the hip, since Jacob’s hip socket was wrenched at the thigh muscle.

Here the Torah is very explicit about the reason for this prohibition.  Out of respect for our patriarch, we have a custom to avoid this part of the animal.  This event with Jacob was the event that led to our people receiving our name Israel.  This name signified that our mission in this world is above that of the mission of the angels.  As its stated:

(23) Said he, “Your name shall no longer be Jacob, but Israel, for you have striven with beings divine and human, and have prevailed.”

It is important that we are reminded of this concept as we eat an animal that was once a living creature.  Even Jacob, whose mission is higher than that of the angels, is susceptible to becoming haughty. By being afflicted with a very human ailment, Jacob was reminded that although his mission was above that of the angels, he must always remain humble.  By reminding ourselves when we are eating an animal that we are also physical beings, susceptible to pain and injury, we keep ourselves humble as well, as we learned from our forefather Jacob.

Chelev (fats)

The second forbidden part of the animal is Chelev - the forbidden fats, the Torah is much less explicit regarding the reasoning behind this prohibition (Leviticus 7):

(23) Speak to the Israelite people thus: You shall eat no fat of ox or sheep or goat. (24) Fat from animals that died or were torn by beasts may be put to any use, but you must not eat it. (25) If anyone eats the fat of animals from which offerings by fire may be made to the LORD, the person who eats it shall be cut off from his kin.

Rabbinic tradition teaches us exactly which "fats" are considered prohibited to consume. However, here the Torah does not seem to mention the reasoning at all.  However, the Torah did leave some important hints in the context of these words.  These verses are juxtaposed in the middle of a discussion of the portions of sacrificial animals that are given to the priests or burnt upon the altar etc... This hints to us that the removal of certain portions of the animal may be to teach us that we should take part of the animal and give it away to others.  This is why the Torah tells us specifically that we can (and should) give these parts away for another constructive purpose, such as to feed our carniverous animals (cats or dogs for example) but not eat it ourselves.

Ever min Hachai (Flesh from a live animal)

Another prohibition is to remove a piece of a live animal to consume, known as "Ever Min Hachai".  In Genesis 9, God tells Noah:

(3) Every creature that lives shall be yours to eat; as with the green grasses, I give you all these. (4) You must not, however, eat flesh with its life-blood in it.

Once again,  the context gives us some important clues.  These verses are juxtaposed between the declaration that gives man responsibility for the well being of the creatures of the earth, as the entire world will be under the rule of human beings.  This verse is stated in such a way as to hint that although human beings have the power to kill and consume animals, there are limits to what they should do.  Respect for life in general is thus implied as the reasoning for this prohibition. We can kill for our needs, but we must also respect.  The following verse then continues to discuss respect for human life, continuing on the same theme. 

Basar B'Chalav (meat and milk)

Last but not least, there is the prohibition of eating milk and meat together.  This is definitely the most unusual in terms of how it is presented in the Torah.  In three seperate locations, Exodus 23:19, 34:26 and Deuteronomy 14:21, the Torah curiously states, seemingly out of context, the phrase:

You shall not boil a kid in its mother’s milk.

Tradition teaches us that this is referring to all milk and all meat, not just a kid in its' mother's milk.  The Torah does not state a reason here.  However, it is certainly quite clear from he way it is presented that the Torah was concerned about a demonstration of particular cruelty.  To cook a kid in its mother's milk would demonstrate a significant and horrifying lack of compassion. One gets the feeling that the Torah is trying to remind us that the relationship between an animal mother an its' offspring is something we should admire and respect.  Their love is real and meaningful, and although we may be permitted to eat these animals, we need to respect their lives and emotions as well.  

I have just presented the prohibitions and restrictions that pertain to the consumption of animals.  As I always do in this blog, I begin with a discussion of the Biblical origins, and discuss what we can learn from the verses of the Torah directly.  I will then begin to analyze the Talmudic understandings of the Torah, as these laws began to become codified and eventually develop into what we now know as the laws of kashrut.

What have we learned from the Torah so far? That there are many purposes to the laws of Kashrut, among them are:

1. To help us live as a holy people, Kashrut brings us to "holiness" (we will define this in future posts) (Kosher species)
2. You can't just slaughter an animal in any way you want, it needs to be done in the way God instructed (shechita)
3. Even when you eat meat, you have to recognize that there was once life here, which is why we cannot eat blood, which represents the "life" of the animal (Blood)
4. We must not eat animals that were unhealthy and were destined to die ("torn" animals)
5. When we do eat animals, we need to take some of the portions of the animal and give it away for some other use, in this way others benefit, not just our selfish selves (chelev)
6. When we eat animals, we also respect and remind ourselves of our own fragility and humility (Gid Haanasheh)
7. We must always give away a portion of what we eat to benefit others (Chelev)
8. We should not waste the animals that are not fit for Kosher consumption but we should give them to our gentile neighbors or to our animals for food (Nevelah)
9. We must respect the lives of the animals over which we have so much power and responsibility (Ever min Hachai)
10. We must respect the relationships and bonds between animals and their young and respect their emotions (Basar BeChalav)

What we have written so far was directly derived from the verses of the Torah, without too much interpretation on my part.  The Torah itself was quite clear.  We have a long way to go with this topic, but I think you can already get a sense of how important the laws of Kosher are, and how meaningful they can be when one pays attention to their purpose.  In the next post, I plan on discussing the kosher laws that pertain to fruits and vegetables.  We will then continue our analysis by discussing  the Talmud and beyond.

Influence of Christianity and the General Culture on Jewish Views of Masturbation

I have referenced a few times the idea that at least some of the negative Halachic attitude towards masturbation was a result of Christian and general cultural influence. I argued in the last post in favor of taking the OMP approach toward masturbation instead of the SAP approach. It would be somewhat satisfying to blame all of this on "the other guys" and say that it wasn't the Jews' fault, but it was their fault i.e. the Christians.  As my grandfather of blessed memory used to say, tongue in cheek, "it doesn't matter what goes wrong, as long as you can blame it on somebody else."

I am sorry to say that in this case, we cannot blame it on the Christians.  At least not the development of the SAP which I described in detail before.  The SAP was heavily influenced by the Zohar.  The Zohar stands out as the most vehemently harsh condemnation of the practice of masturbation in all of human religious history.  It was the most comprehensive, zealous, and forceful religious work to take up the subject, and the earliest religious text to discuss it in such intense detail.

While there are references and condemnations of masturbation scattered here and there throughout the Christian writings starting from the second century on, it doesn't seem to have been a particularly big deal to Christians until the mid-18th century.  Some exceptions exist, such as Pope Leo II (b.1002- d.1054) who wrote harshly about it, but it never quite became a big deal for a long time. One of the most famous books to deal with this subject is Thomas W Laqueur (2003) Solitary Sex:A Cultural History of Masturbation. According to Laqeuer, "the ancient world cared little about the subject; it was a backwater of Jewish and Christian teaching about sexuality."  He claims that the big obsession with the topic really began with the publication of an anonymous tract called "Onania" in England somewhere around 1722.

There is a phenomenon that I seem to find often when reading secular scholars discuss "Jewish teachings".  It seems that they frequently assume that the Jews were more or less saying the same things that the Christian scholars were over the centuries. In modern parlance, this often presents itself as the "Judeo-Christian" tradition.  Unfortunately, all too often, these scholars are much more familiar with the Christian teachings than they are with Jewish teachings and traditions. They are frequently  unqualified to say what the "Judeo" part of Judeo-Christian" actually teaches.   I am not particularly proud of the Jewish contribution to this subject, but Laqueur, when he stated that masturbation was "in the backwater of Jewish teaching" had no idea or clue just how robust and influential the anti-masturbation teachings of the Zohar was about 600 years before 1722. He should've stuck to Christianity.

I am not the only one to point this out, as Shilo Pachter, in his doctoral dissertation that I have quoted many times, makes the same point regarding Laqeuer's assertion. The Jewish opposition to masturbation came out of the "backwater" as soon as the Zohar came to light. Long before 1722.

However, there is a period of time in which I do believe the influence of the Christian world and the academic world did have a strong influence on the Jewish world, and that, I believe, did start with the book that Laqueur just mentioned.

It seems to me that the widespread acceptance of the SAP and the stringent opinions regarding masturbation were helped along by the strong anti-masturbation rhetoric that took over the Christian, philosophical and scientific world starting in the early 1700s.  Starting in this time period, in both the protestant and the catholic world, Onanism became synonymous with masturbation and it became accepted as a terrible sin.  In the philosophical world, no less a personality than Immanuel Kant condemned the practice strongly. In the scientific world, it became accepted that masturbation was both a sign of a mental disorder and the cause of all sorts of physical maladies.  It wasn't until the mid-20th century that these ideas started to change, and masturbation began to be understood as a normal part of sexual development.

The strongest Halachic influence on contemporary post WW2 Orthodox Judaism, comes from the Hassidic traditions of eastern Europe and the non-Hassidic yeshiva world of Lithuania.  Both of these traditions began and were nurtured within a surrounding culture that thought that masturbation was a sign of mental illness, that is was medically unhealthy, and that it was an abomination and a perversion for which God gave the death penalty.  It is not surprising that the Halakhists and moral teachers of the era didn't pay much heed to the opinions of the Ri Hazaken and others and accepted the paradigm of the SA.

An indicator that this is the case, is that the opinions expressed by the proponents of the OMP did not disappear immediately when the Shulchan Aruch suppressed them. It took a while for the SAP to take hold. As we shall see, immediately after the publication of the SA many rabbinic authorities objected to the negation of the opinions of the Ri HaZaken, Tosafot Rid, and Rambam.

It makes sense that it wasn't easy for the SA to suppress the opposition by omitting the Ri HaZaken.  This opinion wasn't just a random outlier.  Many halachic authorities among the Rishonim (Halachic authorities from circa 1100 - 1550) and early Acharonim (halachic authorities from circa 1550 - 1800s) supported the opinion of the Ri HaZaken. Here are just a few: Rabbi Mordechai ben Hillel HaKohen (Germany, 1250-1298, known as "the Mordechai") in Massechet Niddah Hagahot Mordechai 247:744;  R Bezallel ben Avraham Ashkenazi (Israel, 1520-1592) in Shita Mekubeztet Nedarim 20b; R Asher ben Yechiel ("The Rosh" Germany then Spain, 1250-1327) Tosafot HaRosh Yevamot 34b; R Meir HaKohen of Rothenburg (Germany, late 13th century) in Hagahot Maimuniot Hilchot Isurei Biyah 21:9; R Isaiah DiTrani "the younger" (Italy late 13th - early 14th century) in Piskei Riaz Ketubot 5; R Solomon Luria (Poland 1510-1573 "The Maharshal") in Yam Shel Shlomo Yevamot 34b; R' Avraham Chaim Shur (Belz, Poland late 16th, early 17th century) in Torat Chaim Sanhedrin 54a.   All of the above and many more at least supported the opinion of the Ri Hazaken as a viable alternative to the stringent prohibition against "spilling seed".  

It is for this reason that the important commentary on the SA, the Beit Shmuel (late 17th century) immediately qualifies the statement of the SA that the sin is "the most severe in the Torah" by saying that the SA really didn't mean it.  (IMHO. the SA clearly did mean it, as he had learned from the Zohar how severe it is). 

Despite this solid and robust opposition to the SAP, in the centuries following the publication of the Shulchan Aruch, the SAP eventually did become the predominant paradigm. The OMP receded into the past almost as if it had never existed. As (at least Eastern European) European Jewry eventually developed into the Hassidic and "Lithuanian" branches preceding WW2, the SAP became firmly ensconced. I believe this was largely because the same thing was going on in the world "outside.  Why else would the Jewish world almost completely ignore one major tradition and exchange it for another? Clearly, the Christian, philosophical, and medical thinking of the time regarding the "horrors" of masturbation dominated Jewry in the same way that it dominated western thought in general.

So, in conclusion, I don't believe that we can blame "the others" for foisting this stringency upon Judaism.  We were there first :(    However, the fact that it became the predominant Halachic paradigm was almost certainly heavily influenced by outside factors.

The only silver lining I can think of, is that maybe the reverse can be true.  If the general society's dislike for masturbation helped push us toward a stringent Halachic attitude, maybe modern science's recognition that occasional masturbation is normal can push us back to the original Halachic paradigm which accepted indeed that this is true as well. Perhaps. Maybe. With God's help and with common sense and the strength of the Torah sources I have quoted in this series, maybe it can work.  Thanks for reading through my posts on this subject, I think I can move on now to other important subjects. Please let me know in the comments if you think I left something out.

Changing the Halachic Masturbation Paradigm

It should be obvious that the Shulchan Aruch is by far not the last word in the Halacha, and that things have continued to develop over the next 500 years.  On the other hand, this is a blog, and my purpose is to develop ideas, specifically ideas that relate to Jewish law as it intersects with topics of medical interest, and to attempt to develop these ideas in a rationalistic manner.  I think that what I have developed so far in all of the preceding posts, are two very different concepts regarding male masturbation and how this activity should be treated by a Jew who wishes to observe the Halacha. Our Halachic analysis so far is enough to make the basic point I have been trying to get to in this blog.

I have recently been introduced to the work of an amazing woman, Talli Rosenbaum, and her writings on this subject. The reason why her writings are so important is because she explores the negative potential effects that the misconception of the "sin" of "spilling seed" can have on sexual development and marital relationships.  Please check her website here for more resources, and I particularly recommend this podcast. 

The two different Halachic approaches that we have developed would have a significantly different impact on the sexual and psychological health of Orthodox Jewish society.  I will admit upfront that I am not a social scientist, nor am I a sex therapist.  I also don't have lots of data and studies to back up the assertions I am about to make.  I am a physician, and I do have Rabbinic ordination, and I do have significant familiarity with Orthodox sexual dysfunction from a clinical perspective and from my knowledge of the community. Those are both my credentials and my limitations.

The prevailing Halachic paradigm that dominates the general understanding of most Halacha observant Jewry is the one established by the Shulchan Aruch. We just finished describing how this developed in the preceding series of posts.  Allow me to summarize the basic tenets of this paradigm, which I will call the SAP (Shulchan Aruch Paradigm).

The SAP posits that any ejaculation outside of vaginal intercourse in the context of marriage is a sin.  The SAP holds that this was indeed the sin of Er and Onan which resulted in their deaths.  The SAP holds that this was the sin of the flood which resulted in the destruction of almost all life on the planet. The SAP holds that extra-vaginal ejaculation produces demons that taunt the individual into the next world. The SAP teaches that extra-vaginal ejaculation is akin to murder, and included in the Ten Commandments. The SAP does not permit any other form of sexual activity between husband and wife other than vaginal intercourse.

It would be impossible to overestimate the negative effects of these ideas on the sexual and psychological health of the Halacha-observant public. First let us focus on the single young man and what this can do to his psychological health. Imagine the guilt of a young man who masturbates occasionally.  If he is able to open a Shulchan Aruch and read, if he is yeshiva educated, the overwhelming guilt can be awful.  The normal experiences and desires of an adolescent male (or even mature adult male) have suddenly become the source of the "worst sin in the Torah".

Then try to imagine how many destructive paths this can take. The guilt can in some cases lead to a feeling of despair. "If I can't fight these urges, I am a failure at being an observant Jew, and why even bother?"  Such a person could be led into a very depressed rebellion against his heritage, a failure of a Jew. Alternatively, it could lead to open rebellion.  "The Torah must be nonsense if it prohibits normal and harmless natural behavior." "If I can violate the worst sin in the Torah and nothing happens, I an violate any Torah prohibition!"  "If the Torah prohibits this, than all of the Torah's laws could be nonsense too."  Among those young men who don't want to leave the Torah lifestyle, imagine the cognitive dissonance such a problem can cause? The shame, depression, confusion and despair can be overwhelming. I would like to suggest the following link for more detailed discussion of these issues. 

Now let's follow this young man forward in his life.  He is taught that he needs a spouse in order to prevent sin.  So that his natural urge to have sex and experience ejaculation can have a "permissible outlet".  Is he seeking marriage in order to have a fulfilling relationship with another human being? Regarding the important sexual aspect of this relationship, is there an understanding that her purpose is not just to help himself? Does he realize that she is an individual of equal importance who deserves to have a satisfying sexual relationship just as much as he does?  does he recognize that the Torah requires him to make her happy sexually, and that she is much much much more than just a "receptacle" so that his ejaculation is now deemed "kosher"?

What about the young woman?  Is she taught that she must be available for him just to save him from sin?  What does that mean for her own enjoyment? what if she is taught that she must even endure pain and discomfort in order to save him? Is she ever allowed to say , "no" or "not now"? Does she ever learn what a sexual relationship is supposed to be?  There is so much to write, so much to think about.  I refer you to Talli Rosenbaum's site for more discussion. In particular, please check this link. I can't do it justice, but I can highlight some of this in order to get you thinking. 

Now let us rewind a bit in Halachic time.  Let us go back to the days before the Zohar came onto the Halachic scene, to the days of what I am going to call the OMP (the Original Maimonidean Paradigm).

The OMP posits that one should not deliberately stoke his sexual desires because that can lead to immorality.  The OMP teaches that the sin of Er and Onan was that they deliberately engaged in a sexual relationship with the express purpose of avoiding procreation, Tamar was a sexual plaything to them, for enjoyment only.  This is why they were put to death by God.  The OMP teaches that as long as one is engaged in sexual activity in an appropriate relationship, there is no sin of "spilling seed", and any type of sexual activity is acceptable. The OMP also recommends early marriage, but not to prevent masturbation, rather it is to prevent the risk of promiscuity and other sexual sins.  The OMP explicitly uses the concurrent medical understanding to recommend only infrequent ejaculations.  The OMP explicitly also draws upon the contemporaneous medical ideas to recommend regular, just not excessive ejaculations to avoid what was believed to be the buildup of negative factors when one does not ejaculate often enough.  According to the OMP, there is no sin of masturbation for a single man, the only concern is the deliberate stoking of sexual desire for the reason stated above.

Just as it was impossible to overestimate the negative effects of the general acceptance of the SAP, it is equally impossible to overestimate the positive effects of adopting the OMP.

Here goes.  Our hypothetical young man understands that this is a natural process, and that occasional ejaculation is completely normal, even healthy.  He now understands that the problem is to engage in practices that lead to sexually unhealthy activities, not the "spilling of seed".  Such things would include turning to the all-too-available pornography, which can lead to unhealthy and dangerous ideas about sex. This would certainly be something to avoid. On the other hand, normal exposure to members of the female gender, that may occasionally lead to sexual thoughts, is completely normal as long as such social encounters will lead one day to a healthy, safe appropriate relationship.

When it comes to marriage, he may learn that any sexual practice is completely normal, and that he should do whatever he and his wife find to be satisfying and enjoyable.  He will also learn that a woman is to be respected as a partner, not a purely sexual being as Er and Onan treated Tamar. She is there for much more than just his sexual pleasure, she is there to build a life and family together with.  This includes the Mitzvah to procreate.

The young woman will not be there to "save him from sin".  If he needs "saving" and she is not in the mood, for whatever reason, he can either take a chill pill and be respectful or maybe engage with her in other activities that don't include unwanted penetration of her body, even if it means he will ejaculate extra-vaginally.

Furthermore, now that we know that there is nothing unhealthy about occasional masturbation, the Rambam's health related objections would no longer exist.  The Rambam himself, it is well known, omitted from his Halachic code the "prohibition" of eating fish and meat together.  This was because he understood that it was a health recommendation of the rabbis of the Talmud.  Since the Rambam no longer felt it was a heath problem, it is no longer the Halacha.  The Rambam, I  would argue, would likely be consistent and have a completely different approach, as the health understanding of masturbation has dramatically changed.

The suggestion that there are torturing demon tormentors created every time someone masturbates would've sounded both foolish, and worse, even blasphemous to the Rambam.  

Poof. We just solved a major dilemma.  Go back to the basics. Allow me to adjust a common Halachic phrase to our situation:

כדאי הם התלמוד בּבלי והרמבּ״ם והר״י הזקן והתוספות רי״ד לסמוך עליהם בּשעת הדחק  

The Babylonian Talmud, and Maimonides, and Rabbi Isaac the Elder, and Rabbi Isaiah Di Trani are adequate authorities for us to rely upon them in a time of need 

I think anyone who reads Talli Rosenbaum's material would agree that this is a "time of need".  If you disagree, fine, that is your right.  But for those who agree with me that this is a time of need, Let's build on the OMP, the Original Maimonidean Paradigm.  We can use the OMP as a basis to build a healthy sexuality among our youth, and our families and couples.  People should be taught to avoid sexual immorality, sexual exploitation, sexual abuse, and unhealthy sexual stress that builds up in dysfunctional families.  Instead we should teach what healthy sexuality looks like, and how to make that happen.

I would like to inject some Kabbalistic ideas into the OMP though.  However, it will have the opposite effect that the injection of the Zohar had on the development of the Shulchan Aruch Paradigm.  Maimonides had a philosophical aversion to sex in general.  He considered it a base activity, pretty much the lowest form of human behavior.  In this he followed the philosophy of his mentor Aristotle.  If you recall, we mentioned the Igerret HaKodesh in our past discussion of the Spanish kabbalists.  The IH responded to the Rambam that the sexual act is not base at all.  Rather it is a holy and beautiful act between two human beings, as long as there are proper intentions.  If we inject this idea into the development of the OMP, we will find that any act between two loving human beings, in the context of a committed and loving relationship founded upon proper ideas and principles, is a beautiful and holy thing. It is to be celebrated and encouraged, regardless of where the semen happens to spill.

I do want to write a little more in the next post or two about some of the reasons why the SAP became dominant.  I think we need to discuss the foreign influences, the influences of contemporaneous science etc before we leave this subject and move on.

I would also like to encourage people to comment and generate discussion.  Whether you love what I have written, hate it, or anywhere in between, I want to hear from you.  Generating discussion about these topics is one of my primary goals on this blog.  Also, please feel free to suggest new topics. I am always open to ideas.