The Real Reason the Talmud "Prohibits" Masturbation

I would like to continue where I left off in our discussion of masturbation several years ago.  So many people have written to me over the last few years in appreciation of my blog and asking me when I would start writing again. It was this overwhelming and very flattering response to my blog that now has led me to continuing this endeavor.  So much has happened in the world since 2017, and the need for sensible Halachic discussions of medical subjects has only grown more and more intense.  I hope to do my small part in bringing the ideas of Rationalist Halachah into a broader audience.  Comments and suggestions for future topics are very much welcomed, and the real purpose of this blog is to stimulate intelligent discussion.  I want to learn, much more than I want to teach.

In my last post, I demonstrated that the "sin" of HZLV has nothing to do with murder.  I ended with the question of why the rabbis of the Talmud compared it to murder and I promised to answer that in future posts.  More importantly, I must describe exactly what the "sin" is and what the "prohibition" is and its true origins.  Since it is clear that nowhere in the Torah (see this post here) is there written a clear prohibition of masturbation, the origins of the sin must therefore be defined.

In order to do this, an analysis of the Talmudic sources is necessary.  Please go back and review my previous post regarding the gemara in Nidda 13a-b.  I believe that we can begin to understand what the gemara in Niddah was prohibiting, if we go back to the meaning of the words, "Hotza'at Zera Le'Vatalah".The term is usually translated as "Emitting Seed for naught".  It is important to note that the only place in Talmudic and Mishnaic literature where this term appears is in the gemara in Niddah which we just mentioned. In the medieval halachic literature, this term became understood to mean that "wasting" semen is a sin, meaning any emission of semen for purposes other than procreation, and thus akin somehow to murder.  We have already mentioned numerous examples in this blog that prove that the talmud clearly did not understand the term in this manner. I mentioned three such proofs in this post here, Those proofs were a) the Talmud's explicit permission allowing for anal intercourse with one's spouse, b) The allowance of the Talmud for ejaculation as part of an exam to determine one's medical status c) The talmud's understanding that unintentional seminal emissions could be a positive thing.  I will add a few more proofs here, as I believe they are important for the readers of this blog to keep in mind.  

1. That the Talmud, according to almost all commentaries and poskim don't consider the abortion of a fetus to be murder.  While it is under most circumstances prohibited by Jewish law, with very few exceptions, it is accepted that the origins of the prohibition are not from the laws against murder.  We dealt with this subject at length back in my series on abortion here. I recommend that you read the entire series if this topic interests you.  If abortion is not akin to murder, than it would be absurd to the extreme to consider masturbation akin to murder.
2. In Yevamot 34a (and other places) the Talmud asserts that a bride never becomes pregnant from the first intercourse.  Leaving aside the questionable scientific correctness of that statement, it was the belief of the Rabbis that this is the case.  Clearly, they were not concerned about "wasting seed" when a new husband has intercourse with his spouse for the first time.
3. In Yevamot 34b, the gemara brings a beraita from Niddah in which Rabbi Eliezer recommends that for the 24 months after a woman has a child (during which she would be breastfeeding the child) that one should practice what is now called the "withdrawal method"(to have intercourse and withdraw and ejaculate externally).  Rabbi Eliezer was concerned that should she get pregnant during this period, she would not be able to nurse her child and carry the pregnancy at the same time.  Note that this is the same Rabbi Eliezer who said in Niddah: "anyone who holds his penis and urinates, it is considered as though he is bringing a flood to the world. ... It is preferable that people cast aspersions about his children that they are mamzerim, and he should not render himself wicked even one moment before the Omnipresent."  Clearly, even the most stringent of the rabbinic opinions quoted by the gemara did not believe that the prohibition had anything to do with "wasting seed".  
4. Yevamot 12b (and other places) allows normal intercourse and the use of contraception with a spouse for whom it is dangerous to get pregnant
5. normal sexual intercourse with one's spouse who can not have children is permitted
6. normal sexual intercourse with a woman who is post menopausal is permitted 

Once we have established that the "prohibition" has nothing to do with "wasting seed", we can now understand the true meaning of the gemara and why the act of masturbation was considered sinful. The gemara started off with the prohibition of needlessly touching one's genitals.  The gemara discussed with disdain the practice of purposefully arousing oneself.   The gemara stated clearly that these prohibitions did not apply to touching one's genitals when there was no concern for self arousal, and it also clearly stated that self arousal was not a problem when it is in the context of marriage, when there would be no sin involved in the fulfillment of sexual pleasure with his spouse. It is thus a no-brainer to understand that the issue here is not one of "wasting seed", but rather the rabbis are teaching us that arousing oneself in a context which can lead to improper sexual behavior is wrong.

The term "Le'Vatalah" does not mean wasting in the sense that there is a concern that semen is spilled that will not result in pregnancy.  Rather it means that the person engaging deliberately in this behavior is taking his normal sexual sexual drives, which can and should be used in the proper context of a healthy sexual relationship, and he is wasting it for purposes that can lead him astray.  Eventually this can lead to terrible things if one makes a habit out of satisfying his sexual urges in unhealthy ways.

The various statements then follow logically.  The Talmud goes on to compare masturbation to the three cardinal sins, idol worship, murder, and adultery.  While this sounds quite severe, no reasonable person would imagine that this is meant to be taken literally.  The talmud makes so many such statements, for example:

1. Bava Metziah 58b: the tanna taught a baraita before Rav Naḥman bar Yitzḥak: Anyone who humiliates another in public, it is as though he were spilling blood. 
2. Sotah 46b: Rabbi Yoḥanan says in the name of Rabbi Meir: Whoever does not accompany a guest as he leaves one's home or will not allow himself to be accompanied is like a spiller of blood
3. Shabbat 105b: Rabbi Shimon ben Elazar says in the name of Ḥilfa bar Agra, who said in the name of Rabbi Yoḥanan ben Nuri: One who rends his garments in his anger, or who breaks his vessels in his anger, or who scatters his money in his anger, should be like an idol worshipper in your eyes, as that is the craft of the evil inclination. Today it tells him do this, and tomorrow it tells him do that, until eventually, when he no longer controls himself, it tells him worship idols and he goes and worships idols.

The list of such statements can go on forever, so I just brought some famous examples of similar statements.  The third quote, from Shabbat 105b though, I do believe is especially relevant for our discussion.  Rabbi Yochanan ben Nuri is teaching us a very similar lesson to the one being taught in Niddah regarding deliberate masturbation in a context that can lead one down a destructive path.  Just as breaking vessels in anger is not technically speaking a prohibition in and of itself (though it may be considered a violation of Bal tashchit - deliberate waste) such behavior, if it becomes habitual, can lead one down a destructive path.  Similarly, masturbation, when done in an inappropriate context, can lead one down a dangerous path.

I will go out on a limb here and state as follows.  The proper expression of sexuality in the viewpoint of the rabbis is within the context of marriage (or at least, within the context of an adult, consenting, committed relationship if one allows for certain historic and legal circumstances, see Zvi Zohar here).  This is why the rabbis encouraged marriage at a young age, so that the often promiscuous sexual behavior that is likely to occur when youths remain unwed would not lead them down a destructive path.  I am not currently recommending that our youth get married at an inappropriately young age in order to avoid this problem.  However, it is extremely common for a healthy young man to have a normal sexual urge, and due to this stimulation to masturbate.  If a young man with a normal and healthy sexual drive is taught what safe, healthy, appropriate sexual interactions are supposed to be, then there is no reason that this act should lead in any inappropriate direction. In fact, when properly directed, it will hopefully give him an opportunity to consider what a healthy sexual relationship is.  One day, he will find the right partner and engage in what is supposed to be one of the most rewarding aspects of a proper adult relationship.

Instead, too often, what we teach this young man is guilt and shame. No attempt is made to teach him that sexual urges are a normal part of being human.  No attempt is made to teach him that seeking healthy fulfillment of these urges is not only acceptable but encouraged by God.  Does this make him more likely to take the wrong path and seek fulfillment of sexual desires inappropriately?  Will this lead him to be more likely to commit actual sins?

Modern science does not view masturbation as a sin or a problem at all.  It is considered normal healthy behavior.  Therefore, if a young Orthodox man was feeling guilty about masturbating and he went to speak with a secular trained therapist, he or she would tell him that this is normal and not to worry about it.  He can then be taught about normal sexual behavior and thus deal with his guilt. If instead he is taught that what he has done is terrible sin akin to murder, he will then be stuck in a terrible spiral of feelings of shame, self hatred, weakness and maybe even anger. I could not find data to support the idea that these feelings can certainly lead to acting out, leaving the path of Torah, promiscuity  or worse.  But there certainly is a lot of anectodal evidence that supports this.

One such story I advise that you read is to be found here.  In this case, the guilt regarding masturbation did lead to acting out of anger and poor social behavior.  Fortunately, this young man was able to get appropriate help.  What struck me the most, was how after appropriate treaching, he learned to respect women appropriately.  This article here can also lead you to more information on this subject. I also recommend checking out this blog post which can lead you to more information as well.

This is supposed to be a halachic blog though, not a social commentary on Orthodoxy, so in my next post I want to get back on track.  Now that we have dealt with this topic in the rabbinic period, we will move on to the period of the Rishonim.

Am I Really Guilty of Murder?

Please accept my apologies for the long breaks I sometimes need to take between posts.  Pesach, life's necessities, work, and more just get in the way sometimes :-(.  Furthermore, people are constantly sending me new reading material, and of course I have to read it all before I continue to write this blog.  This time I was sidetracked by several books and articles, but most notably by Yaakov Shapiro's book "Halachic Positions" which is plain and simply a spectacular book.  I could not continue to write this blog until I finished it completely. Hence, the long absence, but here I am now, so let's move forward again.

Now that we've analyzed the sugyah in Niddah, it would be appropriate to review the other places in Chazal that discuss issues related to the prohibition of "spilling seed." Specifically, I am going to try to redefine for you what it was that Chazal prohibited, and what the meaning and definitions are of the terms used by Chazal to describe what they believed one may not do.

It is abundantly clear from Chazal, that the prohibition is absolutely not that one may not "spill seed" in a way that cannot potentially lead to pregnancy.  Whatever the nature of the prohibition is, it must be defined differently, and we will be working in future posts to define what is meant by "Hotza'at Zerah L'Vatalah".   In this post I will bring numerous examples throughout the Rabbinic literature that clearly demonstrate that "wasting seed" i.e. ejaculating in a manner that cannot potentially lead to pregnancy, is NOT the true nature of the prohibition.

From here on, I will use the acronym HZLV to refer to the sin that Chazal prohibited.  The reason I will do this, is because I believe that translating it as "wasting" or "spilling" seed causes a huge misunderstanding and is not an accurate translation at all.

Allow me to explain why this is so important.  There is a huge amount of literature that describes the "sin" of masturbation as one of wasting potential life.  We already saw how the Zohar and Chazal compared this sin to murder, and the explanation that many sources have given is because the semen contains the "seed" from which life is born.  Thus, by wasting it, one is "killing" the potential offspring.  As you can imagine, this can be a source of immense consternation to a young Yeshiva bochur who occasionally masturbates due to the normal sexual arousal that happens to a healthy young man from time to time. People like Yosef Mizrachi use this idea to promote guilt, shame, and dangerous misconceptions in videos such as this one on YouTube.

In fact, Chazal could not possibly have believed that HZLV is prohibited because one is killing potential lives.  The comparison to murder has to mean something else entirely.  That is because there many places where Chazal permit or even recommend ejaculation which cannot lead to pregnancy for various purposes.

Just a few examples,

1. "Biah Shelo Kedarkah" which the overwhelming majority of commentaries understand refers to anal intercourse.  See Nedarim 20a - 20b where it is expressly permitted.
2. "Letzorech Bedikah" refers to intentionally causing ejaculation in order to examine if a man falls under the Halachic category of a "K'rut Shafchah"  , see Yevamot 76a where it is expressly permitted
3. Unintentional seminal emission as a positive thing.  See Yoma 88a where it is described as a positive sign if someone has an emission on Yom Kippur.  Although it is clearly referring to an unintentional act, it is inconceivable that Chazal would describe "murder" in such a positive way if indeed "spilling seed" was akin to murder in the way it is often (mis)understood.

There are other examples from the Aggadic literature that also clearly demonstrate that Chazal did not consider any ejaculation that cannot result in pregnancy to be akin to murder in the way it is understood  by many. I will choose not to mention them for the sake of brevity, but if there are enough requests I would be happy to bring more examples. 

If the reason HZLV was prohibited is because one is "killing" potential human beings, I don't believe that anyone can reasonably explain why the above examples were expressly permitted by Chazal. Clearly, something else is involved here.

(Now, I am fully aware that many poskim and commentators over the centuries have taken the approach that HZLV is prohibited and is compared to murder because potential life is being wasted. See Maharal Be'er HaGolah p213-214 for one of many many examples.  I plan on dealing with this at great length in a future post.  Right now, I would like to first be allowed to make the point that this is clearly not exactly what Chazal had in mind, and I will come back to the obvious objections to my claim later, BL'N.)

So far, I have given enough evidence to prove that when Chazal state that HZLV is akin to murder, and they compare those who commit "ni'uf beyad ub'regel" , that they do not mean that it is murder because one is spilling potential life.  So what did they mean? Why did they compare it to murder?  We will investigate that in my next post.

Let's Get Back to Halachic Basics - The Discussion of Wasting Seed and the Halachic Process

Every time I tackle a topic, I always have to find a balance between being both comprehensive, and staying relevant and readable.  Needless to say, there is so much related material that I have to make serious decisions about how to approach each step of this analysis.  The biggest one of course is the one I am about to make, that is the Talmud itself on the subject of Hotza'at Zera Le'Vatalah.  This is going to form the basis of our Halachic analysis, as the Talmud is of course the basis of Halachah.  Everything we say from this point on will somehow have to relate back to the Talmudic discussions which we are about to analyze here.  

I also will have to go out on a dangerous limb and make the following statement of policy.  This statement was reiterated numerous times before on this blog, most especially during my discussion of the treatment of Gentiles on Shabbat.

My statement is as follows.  I am fully aware that often times my analysis will not reflect the analysis and understanding that was made by the majority of commentators and Halachic Decisors over the centuries.  I therefore declare openly that if a reader of this blog will criticize my analysis on the basis of  "most poskim hold ...etc..." then your criticism is valid, and you should probably go to another blog.

On the other hand, if you are interested in a reading of a particular sugyah (topic) that is BOTH halachically valid AND consistent with rationalist principles, then please go ahead and read further here.  That is my goal.  I am trying to look at this sugyah and understand it in a rationalistic AND halachically valid way.  So I will often have to choose and find halachically valid but sometimes minority opinions that will help us understand the sugyah.  It is well known,  and there is significant precedent for deciding halacha according to minority opinions when the need to do so is extenuating. I will freely admit that I believe that these are extenuating circumstances that require us to find a Halachic path that is both halachically acceptable AND Rationalist.

If you want to know what the principles of Rationalist Medical Halacha are, please refer back to the first post of this blog, where I laid out the five principles of RMH.

Now, let us begin.  The most important reference to the issue of masturbation in the Gemara is in Massechet Niddah 13a-13b.

The text is too long to quote here, so I very strongly recommend that you go get yourself a gemara, and learn the sugyah yourself before you read any further.  If you are finished reading, or if you are such a BAKI B'Shas that you already know the daf by heart, or if you are willing to trust my admittedly very rushed and inadequate summary, go ahead and read further.

Here is my summary of the sugyah.

First, the mishna states that a man who "checks himself" too often should "have his hand cut off" (obviously not literally .. but that it is a bad habit).  The gemara then explains that since a man is "sensitive" he shouldn't check because it may lead to arousal.  The gemara then explains that under certain circumstances it would be OK, like to use a cloth or other item to check himself or clean himself.

The second part of the sugyah records a discussion between Rabbi Eliezer and the Chachamim.  Rabbi Eliezer stated that anyone who holds his male organ is bringing a "mabul" to the world.  The assumption is that it will lead to spilling seed and this was one of the sins of the generation of the flood. The chachamim were concerned that someone really should hold his penis while urinating because if he didn't his urine would spray wildly and people would think he was a "K'Rut Shafcha" meaning that his urethra was damaged and therefore they would suspect that his children were not really his own, as a Krut Shafcha cannot father children.  Rabbi Eliezer felt that it would be better to cast aspersions on his children then to do such a terrible sin as to potentially cause himself to have an erection which may lead to committing the sin of spilling seed.

The gemara goes on to qualify this prohibition of Rabbi Eliezer by bringing some examples where holding oneself would be permitted.  These examples would be cases where one is near his teacher, standing in a high place where he needs to maintain his balance, or a person who has sufficient fear of heaven that he doesn't need to be worried about stimulating himself.  The gemara also states that it does not refer to a married man, because even if he did become stimulated, he has permissible ways to relieve his sexual urges, and only refers to holding oneself at the tip of the penis but not the shaft.

The gemara brings several statements about the extreme severity of this sin, comparing it to the "big sins of idolatry and  murder and states that one who commits this sin deserves the death penalty.

The last segment of the gemara (mostly on 13b) continues to bring more related admonishments, criticizing one who intentionally arouses oneself to the point of getting an erection, and it describes how the Yetzer Harah works, first he gets you to arouse yourself, and then eventually he gets you to commit more egregious sins.  The gemara continues to criticize those people who "Commit adultery with hands and feet" and those people who "play with children".

This gemara is the most explicit and most important source for the idea that spilling seed is a sin and a severe one at that.  So please learn through it carefully on your own.

On page 82 of the thesis of Shilo Pachter, that I have mentioned several times, he begins a lengthy analysis of the opinion of the Rambam and how the Rambam interprets this Gemara.  One of our readers has brought to my attention that though I have been referring to Shilo as a "she" that was because I do not know him personally and the only other "Shilo" that I know is a woman.  Shilo is actually a man, so I apologize for this mistake.  Thank God, I live in a time when I have read enough extremely erudite and insightful Halachic analyses written by women that I could easily make the mistake of assuming that the writer of this incredible thesis could have been a woman as well as a man.  Blessed are we who have arrived at this point in history.

Without quoting all of the lengthy passages of the Rambam (I will gladly provide anyone who asks with the full thesis of Shilo Pachter, just send me an email and I will send it to you), I will summarize the approach of the Rambam.  The Rambam includes the laws of "spilling seed" among the laws meant to keep one away from from committing the worse sins of actual adultry and forbidden sexual relationships.  According to the Rambam, there are two problems with "spilling seed".  One problem is that it may be a method of preventing one from fulfilling the mitzvah of procreation.  This was the sin of Er and Onan, who purposely spilled seed in order to prevent their wife from conceiving a child. The second is that by arousing oneself to the point of masturbation, one brings himself closer to committing the deed of actual forbidden relationships.  When one is married and when it does not interfere with the mitzvah of procreation, there would then be no prohibition against types of sexual activities that do not lead to conception.

The scary pronouncements regarding the sin of spilling seed, are therefore, according to the Rambam, meant to keep us away from unholy activities that potentially lead one to much worse transgressions. They are intended to keep us holy and involved in holier pursuits.  When one looks at the gemara in this way, it all makes a lot of sense.

1. Not to hold oneself in a way that may arouse you, unless circumstances are such that it is unlikely to lead to arousal
2. Not to intentionally arouse oneself sexually
3. Not to intentionally think about sexually arousing thoughts 
4. Not to commit adultery "with the hand"
5. not to "play" with children in a sexually arousing way

One who does these things brings him closer to the edge of the prohibited  sexual acts, and creates an environment that can lead toward sin. This explains why this was relevant to the generation of the flood.  It was not the "spilling seed" per say that was the problem, but the unholy environment that was created by their attitude that led to a generation full of immoral behavior.

Most interesting is the interpretation of the Rambam of "committing adultery with the hand and foot".  It has become almost a basic assumption that this refers to masturbation.  This seems to be how most poskim understand this gemara.  By masturbation I mean a person stimulating himself with his own hands in order to reach orgasm and ejaculation.  This however was not at all what how the Rambam understood it.  

The words of the Rambam Pirush HaMishnayot Sanhedrin 7:4 (my translation)

"One who has intercourse with any of the prohibited relations" ..... or if he caresses or touches one of her limbs in order to derive pleasure, regardless of which part of her body he touches for example he rubs himself against her arm or leg. this type of abomination is what the Chachamim referred to as "committing adultery with the hand or foot" 

This is quite different from the "conventional" understanding of "Ni'uf Be'yad" which was so highly condemned by Chazal.  It is very different from what the Kitzur Shulchan Arukh condemned in the quote we brought in the last post.  But it also is so much more accurate of a translation of the language!.  Ni'uf everywhere else has other people involved.  The way the Rambam understood the gemara makes so much sense!  The gemara begins with admonitions not to touch oneself in a way that might cause arousal (even under circumstances that he has no intention of arousing himself as he is only holding himself to urinate), then continues with admonitions not to think arousing thoughts, then continues with admonitions not to intentionally cause oneself to have an erection, then continues to warn that touching a woman (obviously not referring to his spouse!) in a way that causes arousal or even ejaculation is a terrible sin that will often lead to actual intercourse, then continues to warn against touching children in a way that leads to arousal (God forbid).

So we now have a completely different understanding of the sugyah.  The prohibition of "spilling seed" is not an issur in and of itself.  Rather it is a safeguard against getting involved in sins of much worse consequence.  The severe pronouncements about the severity of the sin are meant to scare us away from activities that may lead us down a bad path.  They are not meant literally to say that one who masturbates is actually akin to murder.  There are myriads of examples where Chazal used similar terms to refer to sins as being vastly more horrible then they actually are, and conversely, relatively minor mitzvot that are given way more importance in order to impress upon us how special they are.

How would the Rambam advise a young man who was stimulated sexually by something that he saw, something that he read, something that he dreamt about etc., and then he had an erection and masturbated?  Obviously, I have no right whatsoever to speak on behalf of the Rambam.  However, I would assume that he would advise him to do as the Rambam himself states in Issurei Biah 22:21.  Try to focus your thoughts on holier matters.  Do not ever intentionally arouse yourself. He would then tell him to find a wife so that he can satisfy his sexual urges in a permissible way.  He would certainly not tell him that he is liable for death as a murderer for spilling his seed.

There is so much more to be said of course. However, I am not going to pretend that I have explained the sugyah according to every Rishon and Acharon.  I am only telling you how the Rambam understood the sugyah, and the most readable and rationalistic way of understanding the Gemara.

In my next post, I plan on analyzing several other sugyot in the Talmud that demonstrate that "spilling seed" in and of itself is not a sin, as long as it is not done intentionally to arouse oneself sexually in such a way that may lead to sin.  In other words, not being done in a way that the Rambam would strongly disapprove of.